Marriage is a lifelong commitment that should not be entered into lightly. It is a union of two lives into one. It is a partnership that will require daily effort on both sides to succeed. The seeds to that success start at the very beginning. Before even thinking about the wedding colors, dress, or honeymoon, you need to have a clear understanding of who your partner is and if you can love them forever just as they are. Though it can take a lifetime to learn the true essence of a person, here are some things you should know about your significant other before spending deciding to spend forever together.
Favorite Things
For a marriage to work, there has to be constant effort on both sides. This includes knowing how to make your spouse smile and feel happy. Knowing some of their favorite things can aid you in your marriage. What is their favorite color, favorite type of food, top song, best friend, an ideal place to travel to, favorite thing to do on a day off? Try to remember to do these things for them on occasion just to show your love.
Ring Preferences
This tip is more for the guys. Alright, so your marriage probably won’t end because you don’t know the exact ring your girlfriend wants as an engagement ring, but getting the right one is a huge plus. When you’re ready to pop the question, you should have some idea on the type of ring she’s interested in. Is she the typical princess cut diamond type or would she prefer an edgier black diamond ring?
Pet Peeves
No one is perfect, and there are going to be times when you do or say things that get under your partner’s skin. You probably won’t be able to avoid every argument, but if you at least try to avoid pet peeves, you’re ahead of the game. Before getting married you should know what things you could do or say that would drive your partner crazy.
Children
You can’t assume your partner wants to have children so make sure you ask. This is a huge topic that comes up for couples a few months into their marriage. Do you want children? If so, how many? How will you raise them? If there are complications conceiving, would you be open to in vitro, adoption, or surrogates?
Career Goals
Believe it or not, career goals can get in the way of the marriage if they’re not communicated from the very beginning. A husband who randomly decides to join the military without discussing it with his wife forces her to chose to live a life where her partner won’t always be there. An overachieving wife could decide she wants a business so bad that she decides to put off having kids to chase her dreams which forces her husband to take a back seat. Essentially, you don’t have to have the same career goals in mind, however, you need to ensure that whatever your partner wants to do, that it’s something you can support and live with despite the changes it may make to your personal lives.
Skeletons
The past may be difficult to dig up, but there are some things that you don’t want to leave unspoken. If you’ve done things that could come back to haunt your present or future, it is best to tell your partner up front. You should also know about any skeletons your partner may have in the closet so you’re not caught off guard should it come to light. Whether it’s old cheating habits, a former addiction, childhood trauma, or a bad reputation in your hometown, your life partner deserves to know.
Love Language
Here’s a big one. In order to love your spouse, you must have a complete understanding of how they receive love. In other words, their love language. Do they prefer words of affirmation, time and affection, touch, or gift giving? Are they a combination? This will help you throughout your marriage to show love to your spouse in a way that is most meaningful to them.
Marriage is a lifelong journey with your soul mate. In order to start a positive foundation, it is imperative that you two talk to each other and learn as much as you can. From their health and spending habits to their pet peeves and love language, every aspect helps you to understand the love of your life just a little bit better. When you know each other well, it makes it very hard for outside influences to shatter what you have.
