Resolving conflicts in marriage

In our almost ten years of marriage, the truth that all couples have conflicts affirms itself in our regular day to day communication. Sometimes, even the lack of it. The reason behind this is simple. Being human, we see the world differently. During our first years of marriage, the impatient me will so often expect my husband to think the way I do. It is all too common a mistake to try to manipulate our spouse into seeing things our way. But the thing is, inasmuch as something makes sense to us, it does not always follow that it does to another.

God has made us unique, in that sense as well. Resolving conflicts in a marriage requires that we respect our spouse’s ideas. It is then that meeting of the minds take place. It essentially allows for both to work as a team. Compromise is very often met at this point. It saves us loads of heartache than selfishly pushing our way in. The exchange of hurtful words can linger for a very long time and resentment can snowball into one ugly ending.

I personally find it helpful is to figure out what will be workable for the both of us. Otherwise, there will always be this tendency for the both of us to blurt out words in a condescending manner, bringing us both to a defensive tone. Whenever we do, we find ourselves not listening to each other’s reasons despite the elevated timbre of our voices.

If I were to travel back in time ten years back and look at myself now, I sincerely wouldn’t be able to recognize myself. Marriage has considerably taught me to be unselfish.  It was further reinforced when I became a mother. Marriage is the one school God has designed for us to become better individuals.

The above article is also published via Unblogged, on September 6, 2011.

Resolving conflicts in marriage

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