In the last couple of weeks, Jed developed a liking on opening his bottle and spilling its contents (whether milk or water) all over the bed, in the most unexpected times. Today at 2:16 P.M. Jed got his first real time out. I figured it had to be done. It felt strange, and I was ill at ease, but he has to understand that it’s no fun doing that. I tried to get his attention and let him know that he should not do that, and Jeff tried too. He’d give us the cutest grin, trying to manipulate us, and when he felt that was not enough, he’d do his signature wave (w/c has earned him, and still does, lots of friends and new acquaintances).
This hasn’t been the easiest. But I found it more appealing than having to spank him. More than the issue of this form of training being appealing to me, I want to start and do it all right. Babies don’t come into this world having the ability to choose what’s right or not for them, so I have come to believe that discipline as opposed to punishment (Babywise II) leans towards moral training. Having come from the root word “disciple,” it makes me think that discipline is not a bad word after all. It actually is a training of the mind. If adults need to train themselves in some areas of their lives, what more for a child who has not an idea how all things will come for him whether he decides what’s right or not.
The principle really is logical. To bring up a child isn’t all about avoidance of negative emotions and making everything good for him, even as when the obvious happens that with a happy child is a contented parent. No fussing, no bad moods. Creating an all positive environment is not the key. It will take its toll later as he grows up, not very far behind. Even as early as his preschool years. Being protected unnecessarily, and having the notion that the world revolves around him/her, the lack of self control and discipline leaves this child unwanted by his/her peer. This is very sad.
I pray that I will be persistent and consistent even as I want not just to have a child I can live with, but a child who will be relationally secure throughout his life.
When I saw him listening and really staying at his corner, all the more I realized that he understands. When we tried to get his attention by talking to him about him not pouring his milk/water all over the bed, it didn’t work, but he does understand. I could see this clearly, even as I see him checking out our facial expression, whether we’d approve or not, and whether he’ll hear his dreaded “No!” word, whenever he tries to go or touch something that he knows is off limits. I can’t help but think that my baby is really growing up, and how fast!
* time out timed up 2:21 P.M. (not that I needed to explain to my readers, I figured while I’m already journaling the event, might as well jot that detail down)