Marriage and Beyond

posted by Jennie on May 18

This is SBC-Makati’s brand new church sign. The framed tarp (18ft x 5ft) has been on display for three weeks now. This does mean that our local church is not transferring to a brand new address just yet. After a lot of  searching throughout Makati, the Lord has led us to decide to stay in the same location.

The owner of the building allowed us to lease the place for another year for less than ten thousand pesos on our monthly rent. That is more than two hundred dollars savings per month and that is a huge deal for our local church. Although packing stuff into shipping boxes will not be a major concern for the time being, we are still praying for God to lead us to a better location for next year.

Yesterday, one of our members and I were discussing about praying for a more permanent location – SBC-Makati’s place of its own. By God’s grace, this will come to pass. Our core leaders put it upon themselves to meet regularly (weeknights) in our church for devotions, prayer and fasting.  This has been a great encouragement to us even as we saw them grow spiritually.

SBC Makati is turning 6 years old this month and we are thankful for God’s faithfulness all these years.

posted by Jennie on May 17

It is exactly two years and one month since our brand new house was turned over to the hubby and me by our awesome contractor, Tita Eliza Bautista. It was more like a labor of love for her, more than business. She was hands on from start to finish. This collage was made shortly after the turn over. We were more than happy with the finished product, to say the least. I did not get the marble kitchen counter that I want, all right, but it was still more than what we have bargained for.

We never thought it was ever possible for us to be homeowners, if it was not for the kind of home loan deal we got. Read the rest of this entry »

posted by Jeff on May 14

I am so amazed about the Bible and how it is so unique. With its cover as common as other books, because of its content. However, it is not just like any other book. It stands alone among millions or even billions of books ever written.

The Bible is unique in so many ways. But I am amazed by its continuity, to think that it was written over a 1,500 year span, which is over 40 generations. It was not written by one man, but it was written by at least 40 authors who come from the most diverse walks of life.  It was also written in different places, at different times and written in three languages. Its subject matter includes so many subjects that are considered controversial topics like adultery, homosexuality, sex, abortion, war and many others.

But from the fall of the first family, their wearing of animal body wraps that shows how sin was covered through the shedding of the blood, to the choosing of Abraham and a nation, to its disobedience, to the coming of the Messiah who came to earth as a baby with swaddling clothes as body wraps, to His living a perfect and sinless life, to his betrayal, death and resurrection, to the zeal of His followers who were martyred up to the written prophecies of how everything in this world will end – everything is so amazing.

With the facts mentioned about this book or should I say, this library of books, I am in awe that the Bible’s content, and despite its diversity, has harmony and continuity. It shows one unfolding story and that is God’s redemption of the human race.

posted by Jennie on May 14

In less than a month, our family will fly to the Boracay island to have our well deserved vacation. The little guy has prepared his bag of must haves (goggles, stuff to help him make sand castles, trunks, floaties and lifesaver). It would have been neater if we had him enrolled in swimming class for toddlers, I’m sure it would spare us a lot of warming up time in the water. It was when he was barely a year old when he first experienced the beach. He was so okay with the water. But I guess as a baby grows up and learn about the dangers of the world, he gets to realize the possibility of bad things that can happen.

Well, it can also be that we seldom go to the beach or to the pool for a swim. The last time was last year when our church family went to a resort in Boso-Boso. My little guy was afraid even with his lifesaver on. As for me, I should definitely get back to shape. Otherwise none of my bathing suits will fit me anymore. A couple of weeks back, I had my first ever body wraps slimming treatment. Read the rest of this entry »

posted by Jennie on May 10

… that is my mission before this month ends. It was early this year when I decided that it is going to be a healthier me this year. I jumpstarted with an everyday workout, started with five minutes a day to almost an hour a day. It was a feat, really. For someone who never had a regular exercise for most of her life, that is really something. I then followed it up with getting a flu shot. I was really decided to be healthier. Because I drag my family with me every time I get sick.

The bad news is, it only lasted two months. I have not been working out for a couple of months now and I am not proud about it. Read the rest of this entry »

posted by Jennie on May 8

The toughest thing that I ever have to go through in my counseling sessions is the issue of infidelity. Regardless if it is the unfaithful spouse, victimized spouse or the lover, it can be pretty much a draining session for me, more often than not. It took a while before I actually was able to separate myself from my counselees’ circumstance. And while it is not easy, the fact that it is almost always a spiritual battle makes it all the more harder. Prayer is the one thing that keeps me doing what I do effectively.

There is nothing more damaging for a person’s being, more than having an affair. My husband and I happen to believe that it is important for each spouse to be open to one another. In any event that there are some inconsistencies in your spouse’s actions and schedule, it is just right to allow each other to ask every single question one has in mind, even as distrusting as it may sound.

As one pastor has told us once, when there is a hint of defensiveness, then there should be something that’s going on. If a spouse is attentive, then a secret life of his or her better half should rather be easy to spot. Nobody should know your spouse more than you do. Through the years, you will be able to read each other’s minds and actions without speaking.   Read the rest of this entry »

posted by Jennie on May 8

The issue of family planning in a Christian family is a rather controversial one. There is no passage in the New Testament about the issue of birth control. Obviously, God has left this one issue up to the couple, as long as they do not go against the other commandments. Which brings me to mention that abortion is a no-no. Exodus 20:13 says “Do not murder.”  Abortion is killing a human being.

The size of a family is all up to the couple to decide. Although God has given Adam and later Noah (after the Flood), the command to replenish the earth, a few other factors about raising a family should also be considered.  Raising a family means getting into a commitment to train up each and every child aright. The ability to provide should also be looked into. A larger family automatically means more tuition and basically more of everything.

If ever a couple decides to have an unlimited number of children is up to them. But they should also get into this with the responsibility that goes with such decision. Read the rest of this entry »

posted by Jennie on May 6

One of the many things we are often are often tackled during marriage counseling is how to affair proof a marriage. Another is how to cope with infidelity. The answer is not easy. In fact, there is really no single defining answer to such question. The hope of a realistic chance that things will ever be back to normal is even thinner. That is if we look at it in the perspective that is humanly possible. But even as the Lord said that His grace will be sufficient, it is in fact possible.

This monster that is called infidelity in a marriage never comes in uninvited. But the invitation is sometimes very subtle that it cannot be detected until it smacks you in the face. It usually begins when the spouse involved in an affair allowed his or her guards down. It starts like any usual innocent relationship, very often with someone who is very familiar to you.  It almost always starts with an attachment that progresses into an emotional affair. If there is something like that of a GE alarm that should serve as a warning, it should be convenient. Read the rest of this entry »

posted by Jennie on May 5

It was during the first year that the hubby started pastoring the church in Makati when we started with the couples bible study group. It was the most interesting time for the both of us. It was a challenge, because our marriage was young back then, but the Lord was faithful. He used that time for us to learn while ministering to other married couples.

The Lord led us to use wonderful materials on marriage. Most of which were gifts from my uncle who is also a pastor in America.  The one thing that stood out to be a big issue in marriage is surviving an affair. Others would even ask, does a partner even have to survive an affair at all. Unfaithfulness is hands down, the most devastating experience a partner can ever go through in marriage. Even after everything has been dealt with, it will take a real long while before the feeling of betrayal can ever pass. Sometimes, even never, especially if you try to press on without the kind of support that you need. It has its tendency to continually hunt you and your marriage. This is why in the sessions we have had, we work on the foundation, communication, everything that will keep the couple bonded to each other.

There are a handful of tell tale signs of infidelity. But it is not until the partner has confirmed it that it starts to really hurt endlessly. The thing is a partner only has to go through it once to be convinced that there is nothing more devastating than to be betrayed by your own husband or wife. The scope of infidelity in marriage goes beyond the surface of a wife drowning herself into all the weight loss pills that she could get, justifying her husband’s philandering ways. Thinking it was her fault all along, because she is too big. It even goes beyond the issue of co-dependency.

Although our God is the God who restores what the locusts have eaten, no marriage would want to go through that road of infidelity. I cannot even begin to type the words of devastation that goes along with it. We have always believed that we should at all times be vigilant. We encourage men and women in our church to guard their hearts and minds. In fact one of the favorite books that I use in my discipleship with women in church is Every Woman’s Battle. We cannot focus on repairing broken relationships without zeroing in first on how we were wired and define how the Lord has designed us. Created after His likeness and purposed for His glory.

And just when you might be led to think that this kind of lifestyle is utter boredom, think again. Without all the complications of moral damage, a marriage can enjoy the freedom that no bondage of immorality can ever but fleetingly give.

posted by Jennie on May 1

As a wedding planner/organizer, I sometimes cannot help but be nitpicky on the smallest of details of a program’s logistics. I have had it with events places with administrators who care less and even those who call themselves seasoned wedding organizers who do not put their jobs to heart.

One thing I have not done yet but I hope to do someday soon is a company picnic.The Orange County company picnic featured in events solution is really an inspiration. The company behind Los Angeles event planning is a lady with a big and creative mind.  It figures in the way she handles the team behind its success in the events business for over 20 years.

With service that is as impeccable as Event Solutions’, I am so hoping to come up with something similar to how they do it. They are keen to take part in every detail, which is why maximum fun and success of an event is guaranteed. Read this: details from registration attendants, invite flyers, vouchers for parking is taken care of. Nothing is left unturned and taken for granted. Their entertainment has been said to be the best, with team building as its concept. Theme accents are even offered at no extra charge.

Looking into their web page and details of how they come up with exceptional events make me want to go back to doing weddings again.

posted by Jennie on Apr 29

Erwin and Jeff are aboard the zipline of People’s Park in Tagaytay City. I was not feeling very adventurous during that time, like there is a time I was ever! Haha! It was a good day to enjoy the cool breeze of the city. Our friend Ana who just came home from Singapore a week ago, is soon to leave again on Thursday and we wanted to spend time with her while she’s here.

The original plan was to drive up to Baguio first thing Monday morning and go back home by Wednesday. But because there were unexpected things that happened, like the hubby getting sick, there was no way we were going to do a Suburban extended stay hotel, even if we wanted to. Tagaytay is one place we will always choose to go to whenever we would love to get away from the heat of the Metro. More photos in the upcoming posts.

posted by Jennie on Apr 23

It has been a stressful time for the hubs. Coming home from camp with an oozing 40 degree Celsius temp until the following day is not really the coolest. He thinks he needs to unwind and get some rest. Our dear friend Ana wants a quick Baguio getaway but talked her  out to switch it to a closer but as breezy destination, Tagaytay. There are plenty of things lined up for us to do this week and a day trip is what we can afford for now.

Read the rest of this entry »

posted by Jennie on Apr 21

It really won’t stop raining these past few days. I have to confess, I am so loving it! I really love the rain more than the sun. I sometimes think that I am a Cullen. Haha! I guess what I love most about it is that we did not have to turn the air conditioning unit on for almost five days now. That is really something. Last week we almost had it on for an entire day because the heat was really crazy. Now, I’m dreading to get hold of our next electricity bill.

Read the rest of this entry »

posted by Jennie on Apr 20

It has been weeks since the weather has been especially cruel. It went to a point that doing a minor chore became exhausting. To give you a better picture, the moment I step out of the bath, without the chance of wiping myself dry, is the time that sweat breaks off my pores. I swear, I could have thought I was having hot flashes!

It was especially hard for me, because juggling multiple tasks alone is not easy in itself. The past weeks, weather was incredibly humid. There was even a heat stroke incident my little guy had to go through. I still count my blessings amidst the crisis, but weather was really that crazy.

Thank God for the rains! It was what we needed. We actually did not have to turn on the air conditioning unit last night, when we almost had it on, 24/7 in the past days. We are really grateful. It would certainly make watching from amongst the extensive Dish network deals more fun. I was just chatting with a friend who works for Dish network and she raves about all this Dish network offers. Too bad we don’t have any similar local cable company like it. This is why we terminated the service of our former provider.

Meanwhile, we rely on the internet for our weekly dose of episodes of our favorite series, 24, Heroes and Prisonbreak. The weather is really conducive that I had to ask permission from the hubs if I could watch them without him. We always watch the episodes together. I am so going to tease him with spoilers. Teehee! Just kidding. This is when I sign off and sit back to watch. Till later!

posted by Jennie on Apr 19

Less than two months. That’s practically all I have left to decide how we are going to go about our homeschooling set up here at home. The major things that takes up my schedule is the number of hours I work in the laptop, time with the little guy and the chores. Homeschooling should not take so much time everyday, especially so that we are just doing the preschool curriculum. But then again, it will still be an extra task in my already overloaded daily routine.

It really should not be so hard to figure out what should come down and what to do about it. But I still have these nanny issues and some concerns on getting a helper. Before I decided to work from home in 2007, I was a regular employee in one of those International companies in Ortigas.

Hiring the second nanny (the first one ran away with her boyfriend) was a mistake. My very own eyes witnessed how the one who was suppose to be the caregiver of my son hit my then one year old Jed with a balloon stick. Even with the mark on the child’s arm, she vehemently denied it! Que Horror! This is a nightmare to any parent. I swore that if I would ever have to leave my son to a nanny again, I am going to have one of those security cameras from GE home security. Read the rest of this entry »