Marriage and Beyond

posted by Jennie on Jul 3

My little guy and I had a wonderful date last night as TriNoma unveiled its very own Digital 3D Cinema via its newly upgraded Cinema 4 created by no less than Dolby ® the global leader in movie technologies. It would have been sweeter it the hubby was able to join us but he had to teach a couple of classes over at the Bible school. But we enjoyed the special screening of Ice Age 3 just the same.

Special thanks to Geiser Maclang for the invites! You sure made my 4 year old guy one thrilled boy. It was a school night all right, but it did not get in the way especially so that we are home schooling. There was no way we could miss this, this little guy that we have loves both installments of Ice Age and there is just no better way to watch the third one than via Dolby’s surround system and TriNoma’s plush Digital 3D Cinema.

TriNoma 3D Cinema’s dynamic ambience made my date night with my son extra special. It sure is set to deliver enthralling movie experience for movie goers with its state of the art theatre systems and top notch amenities. We hope to try out the luxury recliners on our next visit. What I love best about this 3D cinema is this is way closer than the one in Pasay.

But tickets and access TriNoma’s cinema schedule via http://www.sureseats.com

TriNoma Mall
4th Level EDSA Corner North Avenue, Quezon City
901.3694

posted by Jennie on Jul 1

Hubby and I are attending the 33rd Pedia Talk Live! in the Grand Ballroom of Dusit Thani, Manila this coming Saturday, July 4, 2009. It has been years since we last attended a Mommy Academy’s event and we are thrilled to be a part of this.

posted by Jennie on Jun 29

A lot of people will agree with me when I say that the most endearing and appealing subject for photography are children. This is especially true when the child that you take pictures of is your own. Like this little guy, instance.

As a hands on mom from birth, I have seen my son’s different expressions. But it was only yesterday that I found out that his face is most expressive when he eats (exactly like his father’s). It fascinates me how my husband eats. I would often tell him that he eats with his eyes. You would have to see for yourself to understand what I mean. Now, I will not be surprised if all eyes will be on my dear hubs during the next food event we go to. He is very forgiving, so I know he won’t take that against me.

My son eats exactly the way his papa does. It’s so fun to discover this after being with him all his life. You’d think he does not like what he eats in these shots. On the contrary, after he cleaned everything on his plate, he jumped to mine and finished everything that I was not meaning to eat anymore. I was full and I did not exactly like the garlic mushroom burger I had over at Chef d’ Angelo’s yesterday. This little guy has a big appetite. He literally eats more than I do.

posted by Jennie on Jun 28

We left home at 3:45 A.M. last June 16. I was a little stressed over the fact that at 11PM the previous night, the little guy was still awake despite tucking him to bed earlier than usual. Maybe he was as excited as the hubby and I were. Jeff came home around midnight from a night out with our guys barkada from church. We decided that we both will not be sleep anymore, besides we were not done packing yet.

Our little guy was super sleepy as we dressed him to get ready to go. We planned to carry him to the car so he could sleep through while traveling, but he was up as soon as he knew where we were headed. It was sweet that we have a next day neighbor carbarn that we had a previous agreement with. Mang Ross took care of our transit from home to the airport and back again after three days.

Jed took this picture. We were killing time as we arrived the airport, done with checking in our baggage (just one for us three-traveled light). We tried going online via our portable broadband but it was no use. The connection is super slow, nothing like the Qwest high speed Internet connection I have read of. NAIA 3 is huge and nice, though. Our overall experience with Cebu Pacific was excellent. We arrived Caticlan 20 minutes ahead of schedule and landed on Manila soil half an hour earlier later that week. I hope they would press on and continue to provide their passengers consistent quality of service.

This is our first boat ride from Caticlan, after having transferred from a tricycle ride to another port. It was our little guy’s first boat ride.

We happily treaded the shores of Boracay before 9AM and this is my first shot of the white beach shore. The weather was perfect and I knew I was going to love it there. The sun was not scorching hot and the wind on our faces was glorious. Loved it!

We did not have a hard time looking for our accommodation place, Taj Guesthouse. We were pretty pleased when we got there and look what the lovely owner, Joewana, left in our room to greet us with – a bunch of fruits with a thank you note for putting a blurb in this site of their place. Sweet!

The private balcony of our room in Taj Guesthouse. I love it. This is where we spent time with my boys having cereal and milk for breakfast for three days. The wooden rack on the far left is where we hang our wet stuff fresh from the beach. It’s neat that we do not need to bring in wet stuff inside the room. The place is elevated, that’s why the likelihood of experience flooding in this accommodation place is very remote. Unlike that of other places in Boracay we have heard of.

You can very well guess what I first did when we got settled – get connected to the internet via the portable Smartbro broadband that we have with us. The speed was worse than dial up to say the least. Definitely a no match to the Qwest connection a former officemate would rave about. With the Qwest phone service that they bundle their package with, I would have to say that we are really shortchanged by our local internet providers. I loaded our broadband twice with over a hundred prepaid credits and we never had a decent connection. It was crazy! So we ended up going to a café and get connected. No, we did not do entirely business during our vacation. There were just a few deadlines we had to sort out for a few hours and then we were all vacation mode.

We did not hit the beach until the following morning, we slept after lunch and headed to talipapa, roamed for a bit and had our lobster dinner there too. I am so happy to have experienced Boracay better this time. No more muddy tricycle ride like the one we had in 2001. Boracay has definitely transitioned to better, busier and more fun place!

fresh water pearl shopping

desserts over at Halowich

posted by Jennie on Jun 28

After a couple of months of not being able to play soccer because of so many things on his plate, the hubby was able to join his team, Marikina United last night as they played against Lourdes highschool’s varsity team during a tune up game. Marikina United won: 5-4. Yey!

posted by Jennie on Jun 23

Mommies very well know how babies and toddlers tend to smell rather sour after a few hours, or even minutes (during extra humid days) after we have given our little cutie pies their baths. I happily report that my son has been sweet smelling practically all day since he started using GIGA baby soap. He would still sweat all right, but nothing like how he used to. I love it so much that I use the soap on his hair too.

The GIGA brand has been a staple in our household since 2005. And I wouldn’t even start telling you about NO ITCH. It magically clears away any trace of itchiness. They both have a permanent place in my dresser. NO PAIN replaced my former pricier Origins’ Peace of Mind. When migraine attacks, my instinct would be is to grab NO PAIN.

I have recommended GIGA to friends and relatives.I remember getting hold of a handful of GIGA products for my bestfriend, Gina who is in London, a few years ago. This is just about the neatest thing so far GIGA has come up with. My baby and I love GIGA’s brand new baby line (baby soap, insect repellant spray, cold rub, baby balm, baby cologne and baby oil) Everything caters to pampering your baby. The cologne is formulated just right, with its own original scent. My son loves it, I do too.

The baby balm is made to help soothe and protect baby from diaper rash and minor cuts. But since my son has been over his diapering years for more than half of his life, I use it to prevent chapped cheeks or lips and moisturize dry skin. It can also be used to hydrate lips, hands and feet. It’s a multi purpose balm, that it has become mine and baby’s. But if you have a baby, this will be perfect to soothe diaper rash and treat cradle cap. I’m currently using this fantastic tub for my son’s sunburn and mine too from all those beach sprawling we’ve done in Boracay last week.

Another favorite that I have from their baby line is the Insect Repellant Spray. We even brought this with us to Boracay last week. Our household has been practically bug free because of this JML pest shield that we have had for more than a year now. But the thing is, as soon as my son steps out of the house, we’ll never know what’s out there.

I always make sure he gets sprayed all over first with GIGA’s Baby insect repellant spray and it has been very handy even in our trip to Boracay. He already knows that it’s part of the routine. It’s funny how kids get themselves into a routine quite easily. Now, whenever he wants to go out to the garage and ride his bike, he’d hand me this spray bottle and he would instinctively close his eyes as I spray it over his body. Very effective. Not one insect bite whenever he gets sprayed on. Prevention is so much better than cure. After having heard the cases of Dengue not exactly dwindling down, there is no way I am ever going to get my guard down.

And because it’s from GIGA, this insect repellant spray I speak of is formulated with all organic ingredients, just like their other products. It’s gentle enough to be sprayed directly on babies’ sensitive skins. Our family so loves GIGA!

posted by Jennie on Jun 10

One of the sweetest things of being a preacher’s wife are the moments when the hubby pauses a while to sit by my side just to tell me things, appreciate me, for one, in the middle of finalizing his message for the next day’s sermon. The most recent of which happened last Saturday night. Sure he does that every so often. What makes it special is the all of a sudden undivided attention I get despite my in-the-computer-all- day-look.

Any wife could make use of that once in a while. I really am thankful for everything my husband is to me. He sure is not perfect, but there is definitely no way in the world I will exchange my being his wife to be the queen of the richest of earthly kingdoms.

You might ask what his sermon was about that got him to suddenly sit down beside me and look me in the eyes with that youthful look of courtship, with the sincerity of a child’s innocent gaze. His topic for last week was Building Better Relationships. The word that he he focused in his message is the word “Appreciation” and why it is important that we express our appreciation to the people around us.

We will find this very common in young children. I hear my son time and again thank me for the littlest of things. Just a couple of days ago, when I was busy in the kitchen, hardly having the luxury to look his way, he all of a sudden quipped, “Mama, I’m happy when you’re here with me.” The sincerity was without question. I did not have a choice but melt and let go of whatever it was that I was doing and rush to him to reciprocate.

In marriage there will surely come a time along the way that we take our respective spouses for granted. While wives turn to nagging, husbands forget altogether how they used to gift their wives with akoya pearls, with all its shine, quality and beauty. If you can very well afford to give hanadama pearls, then you should. Or whatever it is that your wife might fancy. Your gift does not even have to be as glamorous as salt water pearls. You might be surprised what a bunch of freshly flowers picked will do.

Appreciation should always come with hard evidence of sorts. Lip service does not do it. So even as Jeff were with his words, voicing out his appreciation. He followed it up by doing one of the least favorite things that I do at home – wash the dishes, among other things that he does for me in an everyday basis. I can only wish I can love him more unconditionally.

As for his message topic, there are three things that we have to take note of in demonstrating our appreciation to people. First, it needs to be real. If you just make words up for flattery, it will not serve its purpose. It has to be genuine, sincere, heartfelt, void of  ulterior motives. Never manipulative. Second, it has to be recognizable. Be clear in what you appreciate about the person. When Jeff told me how much he appreciated me, he went into details. Never say that “I don’t need to tell my wife that I love her. She knows it.” Third, appreciation needs to be done on a regular basis. It makes all the difference in this world that’s full of hate. Starting at home is the best way to do it.

posted by Jennie on Jun 6

It did not exactly occur to me that Parent Talk 101 was to focus particularly on communication with young adults/teenage children. But that did not get me disappointed. I think it is necessary for parents to be ready way ahead of the actual battle. This is what we did before I gave birth to my son. From learning how to be BabyWise to attending to childbirth classes. These helped us a lot to conceptualize the kind of parents we want to be. It is our first and we knew we had to start right.

There are a few things that I did not exactly agree with Pastor Clem (some minor stuff on child rearing), but there were a whole bunch that the hubby and I did agree with him on. Training up a child isn’t exactly as easy as motivating him or her to get into a Fastin diet. It does involve relational parenting. As with the previous parenting seminars the hubby and I attended, being intentional parents is a non-negotiable aspect of effective parenting.

It was the second time I heard Pastor Clem Guillermo quoted People Making by Virginia Satir, which I will post in a bit. Meanwhile, I hope to share what he spoke on Understanding Yourself as a Parent.

He first identified the first Ineffective Parenting Style. Permissive Parenting – children run roughshod over their parents. Pampering is under this category. Pastor Clem defined it as doing for children what children can do for themselves.

He particularly set out examples that actually struck me. The examples he mentioned were:
• Waking children up in the morning.
• Looking for children’s misplaced item.
• Taking most household chores
• Allowing children to disregard rules
• Giving children special privileges

The first example struck me especially. Although, my four year old son is a little too young to be in a particular schedule (we are just about to start with formal home school), my mindset has always been that I would be responsible for him to wake up at a particular time. Pastor Clem reiterates that this does not teach them to be responsible. The best thing to do is give them an alarm clock.

As for looking for my son’s misplaced item. It helps that I do not have the luxury of time to follow after his mess. This somehow forced me to train him early on. He learned packing away his toys as early as less than a year old. The advantage now is, although he can be just like any regular toddler, notorious for being such a messy creature, he easily gets it when I remind him about the toys he left on the table or on the floor. But more often than not, he does it by himself. If he forgets, he got distracted and just needed to be reminded.

At four years old, I should say that he is doing well in this. Even better than the hubby does, believe it or not. My son is even the one who reminds him, from time to time. I am proud of my son, to say the least. Early training really helps. For one I have to make it work. I have no choice. I have no help, I chose to be nanny-less, I single-handedly juggle things from my end and I stood firm that my circumstance would never be an excuse for me to fail as a mother.

The parenting seminar gave me both valuable insights and validated how the hubby and I are training up our son. Parent Talk 201 will be held in SM North this coming October 2009. I will be posting details very soon.

posted by Jennie on Jun 5

Thanks to Chris of Mommy Journey for coming up with interesting things on Mommy Moments. This week is Time Out with Friends. Since my son is an “unico hijo,” his friends mostly are adults. No wonder he went straight from babbling to talking. No baby talks along the way.

Once a week he gets to have time with children in church. And boy is he really glad every time, that he never seems to run out of energy. These are some snapshots of times that he spends with friends at church. He actually learned doing that “peace sign” from them.

And his favorite friend in the world, so far. They haven’t seen each other for two years but he can easily locate London from his little globe, where his friend Cham-Cham is. From time to time he would ask about her and two weeks ago, his father and I were flabbergasted when he all of sudden he asked out of nowhere, “Mama, can I marry Cham-Cham when I grow up?” Tell me, what do I make of such statement!

posted by Jennie on Jun 3

As much as I would like this to be wordless, I have to explain why this photo for my current Wordless Wednesday entry. I remember a photo of my dear sister with that very same smile, taken when she was around the same age as my Jed. Now I’m off to rummage for it from our ancestral “baul.”

posted by Jennie on Jun 1

Got hold of another treasure book via OMF’s Ukay Bookay! We were able to avail of the 30% discount last week.  :-) I have always known that loving my child isn’t enough. I should love him right. I have pretty much my own idea of how I should nurture and love him, but the question is does the message get across? There have been a few articles written about the Five Love Languages in this blog and it always pertains to how to speak your spouse’s love language. I would love to better speak my son’s love language that is why I got hold of this book.

When you become a parent, it is easy understand and actually grasp what unconditional love is. The Five Love Languages of Children can help you make your child feel secure, loved and more willing and open to interact with you and your family. A review will be posted as soon as I’m done with the book.

Meanwhile, here are a few testimonials from people who have read this book:
“This volume will, without question, enhance any parent-child relationship.”
- Church Libraries

“Even if you’ve read tons of parenting books, you will truly learn something new from this one - something to enhance your relationship with your child and adults in your life. You’ll probably even learn something about yourself.”
- Mom, Massachusetts

“This book would be useful reading for any parent, no matter the quality of relationships within the family, as well as anyone else who is dealing with children on a regular basis (teachers, grandparents, babysitters, etc.)”
- Yarden, Texas

“I can’t speak of the emotion that fills my heart when thinking of this book. It is saving my family! My husband and I now know how to satisfy our children in the most basic of ways… Love!! And I will tell you a secret: they do their chores now with no complaints!!”
- Mackena, California

posted by Jennie on May 30

During the first year of our marriage, we started off with the hubby taking care of our finances. Everything was jotted down. A checking account was opened for better monitoring. We were idealistic. An influence of what I have picked up from Fascinating Womanhood. It teaches about the importance of the husband take control of the family finances so that the burden will be upon him like it is designed to be.

As years went on, the hubby became overwhelmed with several things that he had to take care of and he had me take over the financial management. We were better off from then. He stays on as the provider, but had me take care of monitoring alongside every single household concern. Finances have been a major part of concern in marriage. An executive director of Evansville nonprofit community of Marriage Builders said, “Finances are certainly one of the top five, if not top three, problems that marriage faces.”

It is true that money can be a major cause of discord between couples and this is the very thing that we refuse to take over our marriage. Having both come from family of origins that did not exactly practice the biblical way of handling finances, we chose to do it God’s way. We’re still not perfect but we are happy to report that with God’s help, we are able to pull through the challenges that were thrown our way. Having each other to be accountable to for every financial concern keeps us from wavering. Even as simple as the purchase of the last Adidas shoes the hubby bought, was planned. Athletic shoes can be very pricey these, so we do not just buy without considering our budget. We make sure not to mindlessly indulge and continue be good stewards of what is given us.

Personally, I give it to my mother to have instilled upon me a prudent way of living. I would honestly go for discount shoes than the pricier brands. Of course I still go for comfort so that could be a challenge but not impossible.

Money matters in marriage. In fact, it could easily cause friction if issues are not immediately resolved. Open line of communication between spouses is important to be able to talk freely about several matters, including the finances. Security in the relationship is very important. Without this, financial talk about marriage could just about be looked upon as an issue of control.

posted by Jennie on May 27

Another parenting tip I got from the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids.  It reminds me to cherish my son and indulge him as we sail together in his world. This is especially hard for me because I work from home.  But it is also part of my commitment.  As important as my job is, my child is more important.  It fills my cup to the brim whenever I see in his eyes that he understands why mama needs to work after spending quality time with him. His eyes will not fail to tell me that his love tank needs replenishing, whenever I get too busy for him.

Here is the excerpt from Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller’s book.

One way to honor our children is to enjoy them with their own interests in mind. You may think that’s pretty easy. After all, you’ve been enjoying your children for years. But many parents, after careful examination, discover that they’re enjoying themselves and inviting their children to join in. Often parents determine the conversation topics, the entertainment choices, or the outing destinations. Parents make choices they think will please their children, but in reality, they’re loving their children in ways that they themselves would like to be loved.

One day when my (Scott) children were young, I told them that they could each have a half hour of my time during which I would play whatever they wanted. Melissa, at four years old, chose playing with dolls. I never realized how long a half hour was! We must have explored everything that one doll could say to another. I also learned that dressing a doll is like trying to put an octopus in a string bag. You just get one part in and something else falls off. I realized then that I often choose to enjoy my children according to my own needs and interests instead of theirs.

Do you know your child’s favorite color, foods, or friends? Many children are willing to join in with their parents’ plans and the family ends up having a lot of fun together. But focusing on a child’s interests and topics of conversation can be a good way to show honor. This is especially important with teens. Listening to their music, allowing them to teach you how to play a computer game, or just having a discussion about something they like offers connecting points that parent/child relationships need. The skill of enjoying children according to their needs and interests is one way of honoring kids and expressing to them that they’re valuable.

* an excerpt from the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids by Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

posted by Jennie on May 26

Often our most urgent and fervent prayers regarding our children are for their protection. It’s hard to think about other aspects of their lives if we are worried sick over their personal safety. How can we pray about future events when we’re concerned about them even having a future?

Things happen when we pray that will not happen when we don’t. What might happen, or might not happen, to our children if we don’t pray today? Let’s not wait to find out. Lets get on our knees now.

These are the first and last paragraphs of Stormie Omartian’s The Power of a Praying Parent. These words reminded me when I first heard about Mike Tyson’s daughter’s tragic accident. Who would have thought that treadmills could be deadly for four year old kids, right? As a mother, I have my share of fears for my son and I guess it is but natural. And my resolve as a mother is to continually pray for every aspect of his life. Such that I will not bring him up by my finite and human wisdom alone but for the Lord to lead both me and his father to raise him up aright. As for worries about what could happen and his safety, I would rather also choose to constantly pray that the Lord’s hand be upon him always.

posted by Jennie on May 25

A busy schedule has the ability to rob us away of more important things that matter, like spending quality time with your spouse. Life can be pretty toxic, that is true. But whenever I find myself overwhelmed with the hustle and bustle of everyday life, the reason is almost always that I did not take the time out to be alone with the Lord. My personal devotion is so important that the absence of which just about defines what my day ahead will be for me. It is often impossible to tweak our circumstance, but our attitude towards whatever will come our way will be up to us to control.

Spending quality time with the hubby is as important as having my personal devotion. We call it “couch time.” As we both work during the day, pressures coming from everywhere, it is easy to be disconnected with your spouse if there is no quality time spent together. It is not surprising that a lot of couples fall into the “falling out of love” trap. The lack of quality time spent together is always the culprit. My primary love language being Quality Time, I get cranky toward the hubby whenever we don’t spend time. Sometimes I even find myself wondering why I get cranky and later things will point towards the lack of time we spend together as the reason. Jeff knows me so well that he figures this out before I even get crankier. (lol) One of the things we enjoy doing at least once a week is watching episodes of our favorite tv series.

Last week, the hubby and I had no choice but to reluctantly say goodbye to three of our favorite tv series, the staples of our after couch time moments. It really looks like it is the end for Prisonbreak. We know it is going to be a while before the next season of 24 and Heroes will be back. It would be sweet if we have similar like that of dish network deals where we could choose a spin off from all of our three favorite tv series that recently said goodbye to us, all at the same time.

After terminating our subscription with our cable provider last year, we refuse to have anything less than what special dish network offers. I know it is pretty high standard. But why would we settle for anything less when, it will just cause us unnecessary headaches like what our former provider gave us. So unless there will be a local company that has similar offers like the dish network, the dvd reruns will have to suffice.

As of late, we have watched the first few episodes of Chuck and we are amused. Our friend, Frances won’t stop raving about it and I got curious. The series can be crazy hilarious and very entertaining. We are beginning to love it. A major shift from the heavier episodes of the former ones we got used to.  I so love spending time with Jeff. I especially love it when we pour our hearts out to each other. It takes us back to where we started off. The dynamics of a family can be complex. Life itself is. But zeroing in on the essentials, (like spending quality time with your spouse) make every waking moment a joy to behold.